Ira's Interdimensional Push On Crying at the Gate #5

HELLO!! For some of you it’s probably getting old, the whole goodbye Ira thing. Off to college, then Madison, a one-way to Israel, and now starting a family in the Netherlands, sprinkled with all types of tours and medium disruptions to my NYC-based activity and bar-none people along the way. Each time I go a little further and with a little more flare, and at the same time I cry a little bit more when I go; here are the top tears from the last two weeks for ya: 1. The Seidman Hamilton Affair: On someone else’s dime, by my count there were 13 Seidmans at the Hamilton matinée August 30th and dayum - what a show!! I saw the Disney movie version a few years back and ripped through the soundtrack on my own after all the rave got unbearable but none of it hit much until I was firmly planted in that seat. Cool story, catchy tunes, tragically-flawed characters left, right, and center, and lots to relate to in our current “great” times. I’m still grooving to a few of these songs regularly a week later and keep hearing new lines that strike hard (in the room where it happened and beyond). My Mom was just late enough to arrive to be even more late from her malfunctioning ticket with no way to get a hold of us (being 30 minutes early or more for Broadway is the move folks). More importantly though, she cried at the end because of the duels but deep down I think she related even more to losing a son with my departure only two days away. 2. The Let’s Close Slammer: I was able to squeeze many and more closing statements in at my [goodbye slammer](https://partiful.com/e/rzmi71iragjYDAoMdrXh) which was a super fun, nostalgic, loving, and special night for the books. It was great to see so many people I care about, watch the crews mix and mingle, flow from one to another and back again, and knock it all back with bomb Mediterranean food (two thumbs up for [Sylvana’s](https://silvana-nyc.com)!!). I’m grateful for all who schlepped from far and wide to close and we’ll open again soon. Another hat tip to Katia for the tip-top pics which largely came from this party and until next time my incredible friends who got too litty and forgot their tabs and walked off with my presents and cried. 3. Crying at the Gate: Last Monday when I went to the airport both my mom and dad cried which got Talja crying at the gate and then it was lights out for me too - I hadn’t cried that long and that hard since they brought the World War 2 veteran into Hebrew school to tell us how he watched his friends get shelled. Ten minutes with tears streaking down my face at the gate, everybody knows that everybody knows but nobody says that anybody knows. Talja asked what it was that I was feeling and it was the first time, probably since that guy came to Hebrew school, that I was also speechless. It felt like something innate, like an auto-programming to resist any kind of move from home was kicking in; like even if you have all the best reasons in the world to do something it’s still wrong on some level. Talja and I read (part of) this book called Women Who Run with the Wolves which has an unusually badass title and a nice line or two about reframing loss. The part of the book (chapter really) that we read was about a skeleton woman who would come for what needed to be left behind, a dark and gloomy image for a necessary stage of every chapter. Every now and again we need to clean house - let go of the excess, reprioritize, shake it up although it’s painful, and just go. Sometimes this may happen too early and we have regrets about leaving good stuff on the table (like my protein powder and cereal that I dream about nightly) and sometimes we wait too long and regret not making a beautiful jump earlier. Give the skeleton woman what’s her’s, even through the tears if you must because there’s too wide of a world out there to see, and feel, and love, and experience to not go for it. [As tears go by](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37_J7zpD2ks), Ira